i know how you're supposed to love your family
but sometimes i feel like i don't love my own father
i mean i know he's been to iraq twice
but that doesn't give him to right to keep pushing me down
and people wonder why i am the way i am,
people think i'm such a horrible person
the reason i have NO self confidence
i don't believe in myself
because to me it feels nothings good enough to please my dad
i know they are days were i feel like i love him
that is very rarely
and if you think i'm just whining
well maybe i am
but blogging is about writing my feelings down
and hopefully making me feel better
but that takes time to slowly feel better
life needs to take time for those pieces to fit
i prayed that, well i didn't pray
i wished that things would get better with my dad
but they've only been getting worse lately
and for that i really do wish that my father was still in iraq
i can handle the distance
i just can't handle him being in the same house with me...
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I know how you feel.
ReplyDeleteMy mom is the same way.
Want to know my secret?
Whenever i feel like i can't handle anymore
i go into my room lock my door and say only
two more years here in this house. I grab my ipod and then i drift off and think about how awesome college will be and i will have my own dorm. Just Two more years.
Sounds really gay, but it helps me get through most of my days when i think i can't do it any longer.
And if anything ever happens, you know you are welcome to come crash at my house.